Understanding Tertiary Needs

In addition to our 6 Basic Human Needs and our Subconscious Personality Needs, we also have Tertiary Needs.

Think of the 6 Basic Human Needs as the needs everyone has in order to live a more harmonious, emotionally fulfilling life. These needs include certainty, uncertainty, love and connection, significance, growth, and contribution. While we all share these needs, their level of importance is different for each person.

Our Personality Needs are the needs we organize our personalities around. They impact our decisions, behaviors, emotions, and feelings of connection with others. You might think of Personality Needs as streams that lead back into the larger river of our Basic Human Needs.

Tertiary Needs are the needs that show up in the moments of our daily lives. They are like tiny streams that lead back to the bigger streams of our Personality Needs, which then lead back to the rivers of our Basic Human Needs.

Tertiary Needs are usually short-lived. They do not shape the way we organize our personalities in the same way Personality Needs do. However, they can be repetitive, and they often show up as moment-to-moment strategies we use to meet our deeper needs.

For example, if your need for certainty is not being met, you may look for order in the moment by organizing your dresser drawers. You may choose to eat a snack because it gives you a temporary sense of comfort. You may look for structure in whatever you are doing right now.

If your need for growth is unmet, you might watch a self-development tutorial, choose a task that challenges you, or take advantage of a new opportunity.

If your need for significance is unmet, you may find yourself trying to be seen by your partner by belaboring a point in a conversation. You might do something that elicits admiration from someone else, such as performing a kind deed. You might also decide to participate in something new, like taking a class.

These moment-to-moment behaviors are not “bad.” They are simply clues. They can help us understand what deeper need may be asking for attention.

When we are not aware of our deeper needs, we may spend a lot of time and energy trying to satisfy Tertiary Needs as they arise throughout the day. This can leave us feeling distracted, reactive, or temporarily soothed without truly feeling fulfilled.

There are more effective ways to identify and meet your Basic Human Needs for the long term. When you understand the difference between Basic Human Needs, Personality Needs, and Tertiary Needs, you can begin choosing strategies that support you in a healthier and more lasting way.

Instead of only responding to what you need in the moment, you can ask:

What deeper need is underneath this behavior?

Am I trying to meet a short-term need or a long-term need?

What would help me feel truly supported, fulfilled, or emotionally steady?

The more aware we become of our needs, the more intentional we can become in how we meet them.

If you would like help identifying your Basic Human Needs, Personality Needs, and Tertiary Needs, I would be happy to support you. Contact me, and let’s talk about effective ways to meet your needs in a healthier, more meaningful, and long-lasting way.